Ok, I need to cry for a minute (and stretch out my hands!). This week has been horrible! The whole family (minus Laura!) has had the flu. Needless to say, I feel like if I see or smell any more puke, I'm going to die.Anyway, because of being sick and taking care of sick ones, I've fallen behind on everything! My laundry, housework, school work...everything! I've managed to stay up on the Lysol and Clorox wipes and am just now starting to feel a little more under control. It is amazing to me how much I utilize every minute of every day. I don't stop. I can see that now. I stopped for the week (basically) and look where it got me!
Now, I know several of you out there are shaking your head and are saying, "now, Katie, you brought this on yourself. You are the one who decided to go to school, go back to work, have so much clutter in your home. It's your fault!". I couldn't agree more! Maybe that's why it stings so much. I brought this on myself. This is more of a revelation entry than anything else. I am amazed and sad really, that so much of my time is 'claimed'. I don't have any time to sit and read. No time to sew. Could never go for a walk or take a pic-nick to the park. It's rather obscene really. I do a lot for my family and for myself, but I'm finding my schedule lacks very much wind-down time.
So, I've decided that I need to commit to dedicating a certain amount of time each day to wind down. To do something NOT important for that period of time. I need to spend my weekends with my kids and not busting my a*# working (except for Saturday chores of course!) I need to promise myself that I will do something each day to relax. I will, each day....starting tomorrow! :)
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Good morning, Katie: I am praying that you will have a better week this week, that's for sure!! Being your mother and all, I just have to ask...where is Jeremiah when all of this is going on? Surely you are not always taking care of everything by yourself? I hope not. Everyone works. Everyone should take care of the family. I hope the kids are fine in all of this caos. It will be ok. Really. Try not to always be driven by the tyranny of the urgent. You will miss so much. Love, Mommy
Ok, upon reflection, I think anything to do with children becomes urgent! So I guess what I meant to say is don't add anything to the mix that isn't essential and necessary to get each day done...learn to say 'no' to outside commitments except when it involves the children...like something at school. That will help greatly. I know that is hard because we want to be so pleasing to everyone...but for your sake, you must constantly weed out the rif raf. Time for just yourself?? I don't know if that is possible with young children. I am 57 and still have a hard time finding time for just myself!! Love, Mommy
Well, Jeremiah was helping during the week when he was home and sick right along all of us. But then, when we were all better, he had to go back to work and has been working overtime. He has Monday and Tuesday off, so he will be busy! You know me! He won't sit around very long!
By time for me, I just mean time to read a little bit of a book...or even a magazine! I realize that is not a reality when you have kids. You are right about me learning to say no though. That is something I've always had issues with. Well, I guess when someone asks me if I will do something, I can think "time to read, or do this for them?" and maybe that will help me stay focused! :)
It is so hard to get any down time in the life of motherhood! I can't imagine having so many extras in life like you do! You're the type of person that can handle it, though. I guess the most important thing to remember would be to spend lots of quality time with the kids, since childhood goes by so fast. I already feel the time slipping away with both girlies...I'm so grateful to be able to be here with them! I suggest taking up reading. I don't know if you do already, but get a classic like Sense and Sensibility. It's way better than the movie and it's not all that long, so it goes by quick. It's a great story, as you know, and yet it will help keep your mind sharp at the same time! Double blessing! I love to read classics and Christian novels in any spare time I might have. Even if it's just ten minutes a day, you'll enjoy it. ALso, get some relaxing music to listen to every once in awhile. The other stuff is fun, but I'll tell you what, sometimes during naptime, I'll just turn on some soft classical music and sit. It's a great relaxing tool. Another idea, once the kids are in bed, light some candles, turn on that music, turn off the tv, and sit with Jeremiah and talk about the day. I think communication between husband and wife is vital to a marriage and is probably the first thing to go out the door in our busy lives. These are just suggestions, I'm not a pro! Hope you find some time!
Boy, Katie, I can definitely relate...
So, here's a quote I often think of to remind myself that my values may be out of whack: "Love of bustle is not industry." —Seneca
Here's a quote from YOU that I think you should re-read: "So, I've decided that I need to commit to dedicating a certain amount of time each day to wind down." —Katie
It's like... Let me schedule some time to relax, to be spontaneous and free.
For me (although this doesn't always work of course), it's important to organize my time for all of the to-dos, the tasks, chores, commitments, etc. I know before the start of each day WHAT I must do for myself, for the home, the kids, Brian, bills, work, school assignments, reading... etc. I know WHEN I'm going to do these things because I've planned (at least mentally) the night before.
Then, you have the freedom to let certain things slip away, like Mommy said. Don't make that daily list too long. And get your family to help where they can, even if it's like "Laura and Ben, I know you need help with your homework, but tonight I have a massive headache and am puking, so why don't you do what you can, get your reading done, and at 6:30 I'll answer all your questions. Also, please be quiet."
Turn off the TV. Turn on the Pucini or the Beyoncé.
"Sense, Clarity, Meaning" is a mantra for writers but I think it's a great aim in life, too. I'll be thinking of you as I study at 2am tonight!
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